Never promise what you can’t deliver

Hey Dave I need some advice… although I think I already know the answer. A booker asked if I could do an hour clean for corporate and 90 minutes for cruises. I’ve got about 40 clean. I already hurt myself recently when someone asked if I could headline an hour and I admitted I was more comfortable featuring. I want to say yes – but I don’t want to disappoint them or damage my reputation. At the same time, I’m worried that if I say no, they won’t call me again. What do you think? – D.

Are you being honest?

Hey D. – You’re right – you do already know the answer. And so does every working comic and talent booker who’s been around the business for more than a few open mics. The only difference is experience makes it easier to trust that answer.

Here’s the reality: nobody in this business wants to lose an opportunity. But one of the fastest ways to do exactly that is by overpromising – or worse, flat-out misrepresenting – what you can deliver.

If a booker tells a client, “This comic can do a clean hour,” that’s not a suggestion. That’s the product being sold. And if you say you can deliver it, it had better be true.

Because if it’s not… everyone loses.

Now, there are exceptions. Some performers can stretch with crowd work and genuinely carry an hour without a fully written set. If you’ve done that successfully before, that’s part of your act.

It could be a bomb!

But if you haven’t? A high-paying corporate show or a first impression with a legitimate booker is not the place to experiment.

For experienced comics, this is obvious. For those coming up, it’s where temptation creeps in.

You’re thinking: If I say no, I might lose the opportunity. But here’s the flip side: if you say yes and don’t deliver, you won’t just lose this opportunity – you’ll likely lose future ones too.

So, what’s the move?

Tell the truth.

A legitimate booker will respect honesty far more than a shaky performance. If they reached out, it means they’re already interested in working with you. This isn’t a “one strike and you’re out” situation – it’s the beginning of a relationship.

Use it.

Let them know what you can do right now. Ask to be considered for shorter sets. Stay in touch. Most corporate shows don’t even need an hour – 30 to 45 minutes is often the sweet spot.

And when you’re ready to deliver a full hour – or 90 minutes – you circle back and let them know.

That’s how careers are built.

Because this is a career. And careers take time.

Developing a strong, clean act for corporate and cruise work doesn’t happen overnight. It takes stage time, discipline, and a clear understanding that there are no shortcuts in this business.

From the booker’s side, I can tell you this: there’s nothing worse than putting a performer on a show who doesn’t deliver. The client is unhappy. The relationship takes a hit. And that comic?

Let’s just say they’re not getting a call anytime soon.

And yes… I learned that the hard way.

Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!!

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Bomb Alert! An Onstage Survival Guide

Hi Dave – What should you do if no one is laughing or if you realize that you are starting to bomb? – A.B.

Hey A.B. – Duck and cover.

On stage excitement!

Okay, that’s probably not the answer you were looking for. So, here’s another one that I’ve seen actually work.

But first, a quick definition.

Some readers may not know exactly what bombing means. It’s when you’re on stage doing your best to entertain — whether you’re a comedian or a humorous speaker — and absolutely nothing is working. The audience isn’t laughing, you start to panic, you begin to sweat, and you’re convinced everyone in the room hates you.

That’s Bombing 101.

And if you ever get used to it, you’re in the wrong business. I don’t know a single comedian who hasn’t gone through it. And if one claims they haven’t, they’re just playing a joke on you.

The dedicated comics never let bombing stop them. But the smart ones use it as a learning experience – usually discovering what not to do next time.

In my book Comedy FAQs and Answers, I talked with comedian George Wallace about this. Early in his career, he performed under the stage name The Reverend George Wallace and used a phone book as his “Bible.” The bit killed in New York City – until his first road gig in upstate New York.

The audience hated it.

He was booked for an hour, and he did an hour, but it was a mega-ton bomb. Driving home, he felt so bad he actually thought about steering off a bridge.

But that night became a turning point. He swore he’d never let that happen again. He rethought everything about his act and his stage persona. The “Reverend” was gone — so was the phone book. He decided that if he was having fun on stage, the audience would too.

And if the audience is having fun, you’re not bombing.

If you’ve ever seen George Wallace perform, you know what I mean. The man is practically immune to bombing.

How to Turn It Around – In Real Time

So, what should you do when it’s happening to you?

Here’s a proven technique I’ve seen big-name comics use to turn a tough crowd around: talk TO and WITH the audience.

Seriously — I’ve seen it more times than I can count. When your material isn’t connecting, stop pushing it. Put the script aside for a moment and start engaging the people in front of you.

A Story from The Improv

When I was scheduling comics for the Hollywood Improv, one of our most reliable — and funniest – acts had a rare off night. His material was top-notch, but for whatever reason, the audience just wasn’t responding.

To my surprise, he did something I’d never seen him do. He took the microphone out of the stand, walked to the front of the stage, and started talking directly to the audience.

He kept it casual: “Where are you from?” “What do you do for a living?”

Simple questions that led to funny exchanges and real conversation.

Once the audience was relaxed and engaged, he stepped back, put the mic in the stand, and went back to his material. This time, they loved him. They got the jokes, laughed hard, and he walked off to huge applause.

Why It Worked

When I asked him about it later, he reminded me that most comedians start out as MCs – hosting shows, introducing acts, and learning how to warm up a crowd. The MC’s job is to get the audience laughing and involved.

And the best way to do that? Talk TO and WITH them.

It’s a skill every comic should learn early – one that can save you in a tough room. I saw comedians use this technique not only in Los Angeles, but also when I managed The Improv clubs in New York and Cleveland. It’s not luck or instinct – it’s a learned survival tool.

The Bottom Line

When you feel the energy dropping or your set slipping away, stop talking at the audience and start talking with them.

It’s the quickest way to rebuild the connection – and remind everyone, including yourself, that this is supposed to be fun.

And if that doesn’t work? Well, there’s always the old “duck and cover” method.

Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!

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