Hey Dave – Without revealing my secret identity, I heard you talking recently about a comedian who went way over his time on stage—and you didn’t sound too happy about it. Safe to say he overstayed his welcome. Care to elaborate? – G.
Did someone give me the light?
Hey G – “Secret identity?” What is this, a spy novel? Don’t worry – I’ll protect your cover. But if you were really undercover, you’d know better than to eavesdrop on my conversations. I tend to go long.
Speaking of going long…
Want to guarantee you won’t get booked again? Ignore the light. Stay on stage. Do another 10… 20… maybe 60 minutes. After all, the audience obviously can’t get enough of you, right?
(And just in case sarcasm doesn’t translate in print – insert a big NOT! right there.)
Here’s the reality: stand-up may be a creative art, but it operates within a very structured business. And one of the biggest unwritten rules is simple – respect your time on stage.
Yes, there are exceptions. If you’re selling out arenas or headlining major tours, audiences expect a longer “concert-style” experience. Think of Bruce Springsteen playing three-hour shows – fans love it, and they paid for it.
But unless you’re at that level, stick to your set time.
Why? Because behind every comedy show is a tightly run operation. Clubs run on schedules – doors open, shows start, staff works, and everything from the kitchen to the bar to the box office is timed around the performance.
Only NO fans!
When a comic goes long, it throws everything off:
The box office has already closed
Food and drink service has ended
Staff is waiting (on the clock) with no way to earn tips
The next audience is lining up while the current one is still inside
And here’s something a lot of performers don’t realize: clubs build in “check spots” so customers can pay before the show ends. Run long, and you increase the chances of people slipping out without paying – which often comes out of the server’s pocket.
Not exactly a standing ovation from the staff.
I once had a comedian tell me he was “helping the club” by going an hour over – giving the bar more time to sell drinks. That logic deserves a bigger laugh than anything he said on stage.
The business simply doesn’t work that way.
The same goes for corporate and college gigs. Those events run on tight schedules. Go short, you risk not getting paid. Go long, you risk never getting invited back.
Bottom line:
Time isn’t just a suggestion – it’s part of the job.
For newer comics especially, sticking to your time on stage shows professionalism. It tells bookers and managers you understand how the business works – and that you won’t create problems.
And that’s what keeps you working.
I could go on… but I’ll do something that comic didn’t do.
I’ll stick to my time.
Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!!
*
Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.
Hey Dave – I took your workshop about a year ago. During the business session you mentioned not putting your home address on promotional material. Another comic told me the opposite — that if I’m serious about this business, I should put my address on my website, promo materials, and anything else I send out so bookers can find me easily. What do you think? — E.H.
I can see you!
Hey E.H. — I think you might want to hang out with different comics.
Yes, it’s smart business to make it easy for talent bookers to contact you. But there’s a big difference between being accessible and being too personal.
When you’re promoting your business — which in this case is you — you absolutely want buyers (the people who hire you) to know how to reach you. But it’s also important to remember one thing:
You have no control over who sees your promotional material.
Anything you post online — or even send through the Postal Service — can potentially be seen by anyone. That means not only bookers can find you… but everyone else can too.
And yes, I have a story about that. I’ll get to it in a moment.
First, a little context.
Business methods for comedians and humorous speakers have changed a lot over the years. In my workshops I used to bring in stacks of promotional packages created by major public relations firms for big-name comedians. They were impressive — glossy photos, printed bios, press clippings, and resumes all packaged in designer folders.
Agents and bookers would spread them across their desks and review them like portfolios.
But those days are mostly gone.
Today almost everything is digital. Instead of printed folders, you have websites, email attachments, and online video clips. It’s faster, cheaper, and easier for everyone involved.
But one thing hasn’t changed:
You still don’t know who might end up seeing your information.
You’re looking at me?
If you list your home address on promotional material, you’re not just giving it to talent buyers. You’re giving it to anyone who stumbles across your website or your materials.
And that brings us to the story.
But first, think about this…
The only time someone in this business truly needs your address is when they’re sending you a contract or payment. Sometimes that happens electronically today, but many event planners and bookers still use good old-fashioned snail mail.
If someone wants to know where you’re located for booking purposes, simply list the nearest major city.
For example:
New York
Los Angeles
Cleveland
Chicago
Tampa
That’s all they need to know to determine whether a booking is realistic.
If they decide to hire you and need to send paperwork or payment, then you can provide a mailing address.
Better yet, since you’re running a business, think like a business.
Use a business address.
If you don’t have an office, a P.O. Box works perfectly and keeps your home address private.
The same goes for phone numbers.
Yes, cell phones make it easy to stay reachable, but think twice before posting your personal number online. Unless you have a phone dedicated strictly to business, anyone can find it.
And that includes:
Annoying strangers
Former acquaintances
People who want to “pitch” you something
Or the occasional wacko who just wants someone to bother
A simple “Contact” form on your website works much better. Interested bookers can email you directly, and you keep control of your personal information.
Separate business and personal email accounts as well.
I’m happy to share that publicly because it’s for business. My family and close friends use a different address.
And now… the story I promised.
Years ago, the owner of a well-known comedy club suggested I check out a young, up-and-coming female comedian who was looking for management. I watched her perform and immediately knew she had serious potential.
Over the years she proved that prediction correct. Today she’s a national headliner you’d recognize from television and movies.
But early in her career, she learned a difficult lesson.
She wanted to make sure every booker in North America could reach her, so she printed her home address and personal phone number on all her promotional materials.
And it worked.
She landed a week at a great comedy club a few hours from home — a big step forward in her career.
The club displayed her promotional photo outside with the headliners. She was very attractive, and the photo caught people’s attention.
At the end of the week, after paying her, the club owner tossed her promotional packet into the trash. Not because she wasn’t funny — she was — but because bookers rarely keep those materials. They simply don’t have the space.
A few days later she received a phone call from someone claiming to be a talent booker who had her promo material.
You probably see where this is going.
He wasn’t a booker.
He was a comic who had been hanging around the club, saw her photo in the trash, and took the promotional packet — complete with her home address and phone number.
The calls started out normal.
Then they got strange.
Then they got scary.
He became a full-blown stalker.
She had to destroy all her promotional materials and have them reprinted with new contact information. Back then that was expensive because headshots and printing costs weren’t cheap.
But the worst part?
She had to move.
Imagine hearing someone say, “I know where you live.”
That might sound dramatic in a movie, but in real life it’s terrifying.
She eventually relocated and had some very large friends help make sure the stalker wasn’t around when she moved.
The lesson is simple:
You are running a business.
Treat it like one.
Keep your personal life and personal contact information separate from your professional materials.
Because once something is out there — online or in print — you never know who’s going to find it.
Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!!
*
Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.
Hey Dave – I have submitted to a few comedy festivals each year over the past few years. It can get pretty costly, so I limit myself to only three or four a year. Other than the general submission of filling out the forms and sending in a link to a video, are there some tips to getting noticed and accepted into these festivals? Thanks and I always look forward to receiving your weekly letters. – RT
Enter the unknown
Hey RT – Here’s one thing I love about the comedy industry:
The unknown.
Ask ten comics or industry people how to get into festivals and you’ll get ten different answers. I’ve spent plenty of late nights in clubs and NYC diners listening to debates about trends, formulas, and “what works.” Then – WHAM – someone breaks all the rules and changes the conversation.
Think about when audiences first saw George Carlin doing the Hippie Dippy Weatherman… then a few years later delivering “Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television.” That shift didn’t just surprise audiences — it reshaped comedy itself.
That unpredictability is what makes comedy exciting… and sometimes maddening.
So what does that mean for festival submissions?
Carlin Before
Every festival is different. Some are major showcases featuring established names and carefully selected “up-and-coming” talent. Others spotlight local performers or serve as a celebration of a city’s comedy scene. Some have themes. If it’s a “Women in Comedy” festival, guys won’t make the lineup. If it’s a clean comedy event, explicit material won’t help your chances.
And beyond all of that — there’s taste. The people reviewing submissions have their own preferences, their own goals for the show, and their own vision of what fits. Unless you’re in that room, you simply can’t predict what they’re looking for at that moment.
That’s the unknown factor.
Connections can also play a role. Festival organizers often hear recommendations from agents, bookers, and comedians they trust. Just like agents keep tabs on who’s consistently working strong clubs, festival producers pay attention to buzz and reliability. You never know what background information may help – or hurt – a submission.
Carlin After
Now for the part you can control.
Treat comedy like a business.
Your goal is to be funny, original, reliable, and professional. Festival organizers want performers who help make their event successful. Even if a show features newer comics, no organizer wants an amateur-run experience for their audience.
Your submission video is the single most important tool you have.
Never submit a poor-quality video. Ever.
It no longer takes a big budget to get a clean recording with good audio. A basic camera on a tripod in the back of a club works — as long as the picture is clear and the sound is strong. Bookers want to hear you and the audience response. If they struggle to see or hear your set, they move on.
Also, don’t waste valuable seconds.
Start with material. Not introductions. Not stock lines. Not applause cues. If the first thing they see is you being funny, you’ve already helped your chances.
I recently reviewed a festival submission where the first thirty seconds were the MC’s introduction, followed by standard “Hello city!” and “Give yourselves a hand!” lines. That’s not what bookers are evaluating. They want to know one thing:
Are you funny?
Here’s the bottom line.
You can’t control taste, timing, or trends. But you can control professionalism. A strong video, focused material, and a business-minded approach show you’re serious about the work.
Even if you’re still developing – never present yourself as unprepared.
And remember… sometimes the unknown works in your favor.
Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!!
TAMPA, FLORIDA 2026
Standup Comedy Workshop at The Tampa Funny Bone:
Saturdays – March 14, 21 and 28 from 12:30 to 4:30 pm.
Performance at The Funny Bone – Wednesday, April 1 at 7 pm
Space limited – for details and to register visitCOMEDYWORKSHOPS.
*
Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.
Hi Dave – No, I’m not a comic. However, I’m a WGA screenwriter with a total focus on comedy screenplays. Can you tell me how to contact comedians’ agents about casting specific roles without running into blockades? I mean the blockades typically set up by the gatekeepers of those agents. Best – HK
Leave a message
Hey HK – The bigger the comedians (think celebrity) they represent, the bigger the agency blockade will be. When you make a call without prior personal contact or a great reference, plan some extra time on the phone for holding, transfers and a final request to leave a voice message and “Someone will get back with you.”
Does anyone really know who that “someone” is? I doubt it because they rarely call back without prior contact or reference. And unless you left a voice message with a great pitch (offer) that includes the opportunity for a lot of potential $$$’s (yeah, I’m jaded) you’ll spend a long time looking at your phone waiting for that return call.
Cold calling agents is usually a losing game.
That’s not cynicism. That’s how the business works.
But there is a reliable path forward — and it’s the same one that comedians use to get booked, discovered, and cast:
Be seen. Be present. Be part of the scene.
Come on in!
When I worked as a talent coordinator at the Improv clubs in Los Angeles and New York, I watched industry relationships form every night. Comics performed. Agents, managers, producers, and writers watched. After the show, everyone gathered, talked, and connected. Opportunities didn’t come from cold outreach — they came from proximity and familiarity.
Producers frequently contacted the clubs looking for specific “types” for TV and film roles. That’s why you sometimes see several comedians with similar looks or personas performing short sets in a row. They’re not just performing — they’re showcasing.
And once someone is seen in the right context, access changes instantly. Conversations happen. Meetings follow. Gatekeepers step aside.
Here’s the practical takeaway for writers looking to cast comedians:
Don’t start with the agent. Start with the comedian.
Go to the clubs. Watch performers live. Identify who truly fits your project — not just who’s famous. Introduce yourself professionally after the show. Be respectful. Be clear. Be human.
If a comedian is interested, they can open the door to their agent with one phone call. That personal connection does more than any cold pitch ever will.
Is networking easy?
No. The entertainment industry runs on relationships, persistence, and yes — a bit of schmoozing. There’s a reason “Let’s do lunch” became standard vocabulary.
But if it didn’t work, nobody would keep doing it.
For established names, access is automatic. For everyone else, access is earned through visibility and connection.
Be part of the scene.
That’s how you get seen.
And once you’re seen, you have a chance to be heard.
Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!!
TAMPA, FLORIDA
Standup Comedy Workshop at The Tampa Funny Bone:
Saturdays – March 14, 21 and 28 from 12:30 to 4:30 pm.
Performance at The Funny Bone – Wednesday, April 1 at 7 pm
Space limited – for details and to register visitCOMEDYWORKSHOPS.
*
Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.
Hey Dave – I had a great set last night, but one of the comedians who went on after me tore into me. It got really personal, and it honestly hurt. The people running the show asked if I wanted to go back on and get revenge, but I declined. Did I handle it the right way? – N.R.
Best revenge!
Hey N.R. – It sounds like the opening shot in a potential comedy war. Whether you want to crawl into the comedy trenches (a common comedy term — not mine) with this loudmouth depends on two things:
• Your onstage personality — your comic voice • How you want to be seen onstage and offstage in this business
Maybe I’m naive, but after a few decades working with comedians, I’ve found this business to be far more supportive than people think. Sure, there are jerks — real pains in the butt — but I don’t know any career path that’s immune from that.
When this kind of behavior happens, it’s usually fueled by jealousy, ego, or a power trip. And here’s the irony: in my experience, the more power someone actually has in the business, the more supportive they tend to be of newer talent. That goes for comedians, bookers, and behind-the-scenes decision-makers.
Disbelief?
(I can practically feel the disbelief from some readers right now. This may turn into a future FAQ — I’ll let that thought marinate.)
For now, here’s the real issue:
Who are you onstage, and how do you want to be perceived by the people you work with — other comics and the people who hire them?
Comedians who are genuine friends tear into each other onstage all the time. That can be hilarious. At the NYC Improv, we could run a microphone into the men’s room and hold it over a flushing toilet when a friend’s joke bombed. The comic onstage ripped into us for the rest of the set, and everyone loved it.
That’s playful.
That’s earned.
That’s mutual.
What you experienced sounds different.
SPECIAL EVENT – ORLANDO, FLORIDA!
Standup Comedy Workshop at The Orlando Funny Bone:
Saturdays – February 7, 14 and 28 from noon to 4 pm.
Performance at The Funny Bone – Wednesday, March 4 at 7 pm
Space limited – for details and to register visitCOMEDYWORKSHOPS.
*
When it’s mean-spirited, there’s no upside. An unprovoked attack is almost always about making him look better at your expense — jealousy, ego, or both.
There are two ways to handle this, and the right choice depends on who you are.
If you’re the kind of comedian who can verbally dismantle someone — truly dismantle them — then by all means, go for it. A skilled insult comic doesn’t absorb cheap shots; they return them with interest. Think Nikki Glaser, Marc Maron, Wanda Sykes, Dave Attell, Jeff Ross. An insult comic worth their weight can turn a heckler — or a fellow comic — into roadkill.
If that’s you, next time: aim for the throat.
But if that’s not your voice — onstage or in life — then you absolutely did the right thing by walking away.
Let this guy burn his own reputation. Comics don’t want to work with someone known for cheap shots. And bookers? They want the least amount of drama possible. Speaking from experience as a booker, I’ve passed on very funny non-headliners simply because they were a pain to deal with.
If someone else is just as funny — and easier to work with — that’s who gets the gig. Every time.
In a perfect world, your only focus should be becoming a better comedian. If someone chasing the same goal doesn’t like you, you’re probably doing something right.
Want revenge? Get more laughs. That leads to more bookings.
Use this moment as fuel. If your work ethic and focus pay off, maybe someday this loudmouth will be parking cars outside a comedy club, ripping into his coworkers — while you’re inside headlining.
Make it happen.
Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!!
SPECIAL EVENT – ORLANDO, FLORIDA!
Standup Comedy Workshop at The Orlando Funny Bone:
Saturdays – February 7, 14 and 28 from noon to 4 pm.
Performance at The Funny Bone – Wednesday, March 4 at 7 pm
Space limited – for details and to register visitCOMEDYWORKSHOPS.
*
Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.
By Siddesh Pai – “I Help Comedians, Humor Keynote Speakers & Entrepreneurs Enhance Their Personal Brand Through Targeted Newsletters | Standup Comedian”
Readers: You can locate Siddesh Pai through the following link on LinkedIn. This is an interview we did earlier this year and I liked it enough to share it. Thanks Siddesh and keep laughing!!
3 Lessons I Learned From a 30-Year Comedy Veteran – Dave Schwensen
Talking comedy
Dave has been working in comedy for three decades. But he wants to make one thing clear: he’s not a stand-up comedian. To me, it felt like a writer who doesn’t read. But that’s exactly what makes him different—he’s spent his career booking, coaching, and writing on the business of comedy. In our conversation, he dropped some serious wisdom on why treating comedy like a business is the key to making it a career.
1) Comedy Can’t Be Taught—But It Can Be Coached
“I don’t believe you can teach comedy. What I think is funny, you might not. My kids certainly don’t think I’m funny.” I can’t tell you the Three Stooges are funny if you don’t find slipping on a banana peel hilarious, there’s nothing he can do to change that. This is where coaching comes in. Every comedian has a different style, a different rhythm, and a different worldview. Dave helps comics refine that—polishing the delivery, cutting the fat from jokes, and shaping a strong act. Because at the end of the day, you can’t teach funny. But you can help someone be funnier.
2) No One Is Going to Hand You Stage Time – You Have to Create It
“You can’t teach timing, you can’t teach delivery, and you sure as hell can’t teach stage presence. You have to get up there and do it.” Most comedians think getting better means hitting open mics over and over. But Dave has a different take – go where the audience actually wants entertainment. Clubs are competitive. You’re performing for other comics, waiting for their turn. But business events, fundraisers, and community groups? They’re desperate for entertainment. Your first gigs might be free, but that’s how you build momentum. One day, you’re performing at a Rotary Club for free. The next, someone offers you $500 to do the same set. Stage time is currency. The more you get, the faster you grow.
3) They Call It Amateur Night, But No One Is Trying to Hire an Amateur
A lot of comedians treat stand-up like a passion project. But the ones who make a career out of it? They treat it like a business. – Networking Matters – Hanging out with comics at open mics isn’t enough. Get to know bookers, producers, and event organizers. These are the people who can actually get you paid work. – Market Yourself – Being funny isn’t enough if no one knows you exist. Build a brand, create content, and stay on people’s radar. Your name should pop up when someone’s looking for a comedian. – Be a Professional – Show up on time. Have a tight five. Be easy to work with. Give people your business card. Make yourself easy to book. The comedians who get booked aren’t just the funniest—they’re the ones who treat it like a business.
Thanks for reading – and keep laughing!
Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.
For comments, questions about workshops and coaching please email – Dave@TheComedyBook.com
