Category Archives: audition

Business card – got one?

Posted on by

Hi Dave – I’ve decided to order business cards. I was wondering what information I should include. I was thinking phone number, email, and website. Is there anything else I need, or any reason not to include my address? – K.S.

Hey K.S. – Great decision. I’m always surprised how many comedians or performers still don’t have business cards. Maybe they think it’s a relic from the past—like mailing out DVDs instead of sending a link—but a business card is still an important promotional tool.

How is anyone supposed to know you’re out there and available for gigs if you don’t promote yourself? Unless you’re already a known comic, have a Comedy Central special, or a big-time agent pushing for you, you need to be prepared to handle the business side of your career.

Of course, the first step in any business is to be so good on stage that people want to see you again. That comes from writing, performing, then repeating the process countless times. But once you’re ready to move forward, promotion becomes a major part of your plan. It helps you take advantage of opportunities that can lead to showcases and paying gigs.

Promotion gets your foot in the door. Talent, hard work, and dedication are what get you hired. As I say in my book Comedy FAQs and Answers:

They may call it amateur night, but nobody’s looking to hire an amateur.

Memorize that—it’s true.

Now, your question wasn’t about showcases or all the ways to promote yourself, so let’s talk specifically about business cards.

I write a lot about networking and being part of your local comedy scene because you never know who you’ll meet—someone who could genuinely help your career. But are you prepared when that moment happens?

My latest

Back when I worked at The Improv, comedians would often ask how to get an audition or how to submit a video. Then, instead of handing over a business card, they’d say, “Let me give you my email,” and expect a manager to write it down—or they’d start searching for a bar napkin to scribble on.

Were they nuts? That’s not how you make a professional impression. And in my head, every time someone did that, I’d think: “Amateur…”

Even worse, some comics would just give their name and say, “I’ll send you my link,” or “Keep me in mind for showcases.”

Sorry, but I’m terrible with names. Honestly, there’s a woman interrupting me right now while I’m trying to write this. Her name escapes me… I should remember it—we’re married.

Get the idea?

People like talent bookers, event planners, and club managers deal with a lot of names. Make it easy for them to remember you and contact you. Business cards aren’t outdated or uncool. They’re a simple, effective professional tool.

So to finally answer your question:

Your business card should include:

  • Your name
  • What you do (comedian, speaker, etc.)
  • Your best contact info
    • Phone
    • Email
    • Website (with video and promo materials)

If you have a blog, newsletter, or podcast that supports your career and is actually interesting, you can include that link too.

Electronic business cards—QR codes, NFC cards, or files you can Airdrop—are also becoming popular. They’re great to have, but not everyone uses them yet. For someone just getting started, keep it simple and carry regular business cards.

A smart move is to design your card so it stands out. A photo or logo works, but if you (or a designer friend) can create something genuinely unique, memorable, or just plain cool, people are far more likely to keep it instead of losing it in a drawer.

On the flip side!

Try out a few designs on any inexpensive business card site—there are plenty—and don’t leave the house without at least a few cards on you. You can update or redesign them any time since they’re cheap and sometimes even free.

If you’re serious about building a career, you have to take promoting and networking seriously. When you meet someone new or stumble into an opportunity, a business card clearly communicates who you are and how to reach you. There’s nothing amateur about that.

One important warning:

Never put your home address on your business card or any promotional material. You don’t know where that card may end up, and the last thing you want is some wacko showing up at your door. Yes, this has happened—to both male and female performers.

A business card isn’t an outdated relic. It’s a simple, professional way to help people find you—and hire you.

Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!!

Winter 2026 Standup Comedy Workshop at The Cleveland Funny Bone:

Saturdays – January 10, 17 and 24 from noon to 4 pm.

Performance at The Funny Bone – Thursday, January 29 at 7:30 pm

Space limited – for details and to register visit COMEDYWORKSHOPS.

*

Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.

Open Mics for Corporate Comedians

Posted on by

Hey Dave – Last week you talked about ‘what is corporate comedy material.’ I would also like to learn about getting into doing comedy and humorous keynotes at corporate events. – E.M.

Not a late-night open mic audience!

Hey E.M. – Let’s pick up where we left off. Last time, I talked about the kind of material comedians need to develop to get hired for corporate events. But the bigger question is: how and where do you develop that kind of act?

Here’s the challenge: the type of material you’ll need—G to PG (max) and often with a business-related angle—doesn’t always work in the usual late-night, beer-soaked open mics. But that doesn’t matter, because those crowds aren’t your audience anyway.

Your real audience consists of business owners and event planners, and you’ll find them at morning, afternoon, and evening business or association meetings. Instead of bars at midnight, look for stage time at Rotary breakfasts, Knights of Columbus luncheons, and College Club dinners—just to name a few. Almost every town has groups like these, and they’re always looking for speakers or entertainers.

Bonus incentive!

These slots usually run anywhere from five to twenty minutes—often slotted between the entrée and dessert.

Here’s the key: treat these meetings like open mics. Don’t expect to get paid (at least not at first). The magic word for getting these spots is FREE. Offer to do a clean five-minute comedy set before their featured speaker, and you’re far less likely to hear the other magic word in comedy: NO.

In my own experience, I was almost never turned down. The only exception was a 90-year-old Rotary member in the Midwest who thought his club wasn’t interested in anything except insurance, fertilizer—or both. When I explained I spoke on humor and creativity, he sounded ready to have me arrested for being anti-American. I politely thanked him, called another Rotary club, said the word FREE, and got booked right away.

As you continue writing and testing material that works in this environment, aim for longer sets—up to the typical 20-minute featured program. From my experience, most organizers welcome a variety of speakers. After all, you can’t have insurance, fertilizer, or a combo of both every single week.

After doing these enough times—and enjoying more than my fair share of free breakfasts, lunches, and dinners—I had built a solid corporate program. From there, it was a matter of networking and promoting, and before long, I was booking paid gigs. That never would’ve happened if I had tried to shape my corporate act at late-night open mics.

So, if you’re serious about the corporate market, this is a proven way to get started. And, by the way, the advice is FREE. If you can make an audience laugh at 7:30 in the morning over scrambled eggs and coffee, you’ve got a real shot at making it in the corporate comedy and keynote world.

Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!

For details (and free 10-minute consultation) visit Private Coaching.

Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.

Always good to ask before you audition

Posted on by

Hey Dave – I have a big audition coming up. I’m not going to have any profanity in my (comedy) set, but I’m thinking of having a cleaner version and another one that is a bit edgier. I’m thinking of asking the panel of judges what type of set they want before I perform. Do you think this is a good idea? Thanks – DS

Hey DS,

What’s the question?

Absolutely! I think it’s a smart move to ask the judges—or any talent booker—about any content or language restrictions before you perform. In fact, I emphasize this in my workshops for a couple of important reasons:

  1. It shows professionalism – Being able to adjust your material based on the audience is key. Talent bookers appreciate that because it’s a sign you understand the business side of things.
  2. It gives you an edge over the competition – As much as I love talking about the supportive nature of the comedy community, let’s face it: not everyone can be hired. To stand out at showcases, you need to tailor your performance to the audience. And yes, comedy is a business, so that’s an important part of it.

For instance, let’s say there are only five spots available for a television show, but plenty of comics auditioning. Sure, being funny is crucial, but assuming everyone is equally funny and knows the right people, the deciding factor often comes down to whether you can adapt your set for the audience.

You wouldn’t perform the same set on The Disney Channel that you would on a Comedy Central Roast, right?

Here’s another example:

Did she really say that?

If you’re auditioning for a cruise ship gig, you wouldn’t walk on stage and start dropping F-bombs or overshare about your personal life. A lot of the onboard comedy shows are family-friendly—early evening performances with kids in the audience—and then later, after the kids are asleep, the adult shows take over. But if you can’t show you can adapt to both audiences, you likely won’t get the gig.

So, how would you know these nuances if you’ve never been on a cruise ship or worked in that environment? That’s where asking beforehand comes in handy.

Of course, if you’ve already found your comedy voice and certain venues aren’t a fit, that’s totally fine! I’m not saying you should always work clean. But if you know your material wouldn’t be acceptable for a specific gig (say, a family show), you’re not only wasting your time, but also taking an opportunity away from another comic who’d be a better fit for that audience.

Another example: when I booked comics for A&E’s An Evening at the Improv, we had specific guidelines for the performances. We’d go over them with the comics before the taping:

  1. Avoid making fun of God or religion – Our highest ratings were in The Bible Belt, and we didn’t want to risk alienating that audience. Plus, higher ratings bring in sponsors, so it’s good business.
  2. No bashing specific products – We couldn’t afford lawsuits, so no dissing a car brand or fast-food chain. Business, once again!
  3. Song parodies were limited – We had a strict 18-second rule to avoid paying song royalties for TV broadcasts.

So, what happened if a comic didn’t follow these rules?

If you watch reruns, you might notice some comics are only on-screen for 4 or 5 minutes instead of the usual 7. Why? They didn’t follow the guidelines, and that gets edited out. It’s an easy fix in the editing room, or even before the performance in the case of live auditions.

When it comes to working clubs, it’s almost always possible to check with the talent booker beforehand to ask if there are any material restrictions. They should be upfront with you because they know their audience best.

The goal for any talent booker is to find performers who can connect with their venue’s audience. This applies to comedy contests too, since the bigger business goal is to turn first-time audience members into repeat customers. And to figure out what works for their audience? You’ve got to ask.

Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!

Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.

For comments, questions about workshops and coaching please email – Dave@TheComedyBook.com

Finding stage time in Los Angeles

Posted on by

Hey Dave – I won a contest for a trip to Los Angeles to appear in a commercial. Unfortunately, since I’m not in SAG-AFTRA (Actors Guild), I’m being buried in the background as an extra. I’m pretty stoked about the trip though. I’m hoping to hit one of the popular comedy clubs in Hollywood and see if they’ll let me do a guest set. I’m wondering if you have any recommendations. I’ll be there next week for six days. – S.

LA – where dreams can come true!

Hey S. – First, congratulations! Winning a contest for a trip to L.A. is very cool, even if they’re burying you in the background since you’re not in the actor’s union. Consider it motivation to get that SAG-AFTRA card — though, to be honest, I had mine for years and still got buried in the background plenty of times.

Here’s the scoop — and, of course, your experience might be different:

Unless you’re already a well-known or semi-known headliner or feature with credits and contacts who can vouch for you, it’s extremely tough to get stage time at the popular Hollywood clubs when you’re just in town for a week. The local comics have invested years hanging out, showcasing, networking, taking workshops, bringing paying audiences (“bringer shows”), and doing whatever it takes to get seen.

The bookers at clubs like The Improv, The Comedy Store, and The Laugh Factory need to spend their time on comedians they can actually book again soon. Giving a visiting comic a guest spot doesn’t help them much — unless you have a strong recommendation from a trusted regular (and I mean a real regular, not someone who’s just emceeing Monday open-mic nights).

I’ve been the talent booker at The Improv in L.A., so trust me — I know how this works.

So, to be blunt: it’s very unlikely you’ll score stage time at the big-name clubs during your short trip. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be a productive comedy visit.

Here’s what I recommend:

 

👉 Hit the open mics. L.A. has tons of them — Google “Los Angeles comedy open mics 2025” and you’ll find plenty. In fact, I just did and here’s a LINK. Always check that they’re still running — venues open and close fast. Call ahead or reach out to whoever books it. Some shows may ask you to bring guests; some may squeeze you in because you’re from out of town. You won’t know unless you ask.

👉 Check out the big clubs anyway. Even if you can’t get on stage, you should absolutely go watch a show or two. See how the pros work. Weeknight shows are best for watching up-and-coming comics; weekends are more touristy and packed with big names you can see on TV. You’ll learn a lot just by observing.

👉 Use this trip for inspiration. Wherever you find comedians, you’ll find comics hunting for stage time. It’s part of the grind. So, treat this trip as a chance to network, see what’s working in a major scene, and maybe make a few connections you can build on down the line.

Enjoy the commercial shoot, make the most of your free time, and soak up everything you can. Who knows? Maybe your next visit will be with a SAG-AFTRA card — and a real spot on the lineup.

Break a leg and have a blast in L.A.!

Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!

Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.

For comments, questions about workshops and coaching please email – Dave@TheComedyBook.com

Comedy contests offer stage time

Posted on by

Hi Dave – I did an open mic and saw the club was hosting another round of their “Best Amateur Comedian” contest. I want to enter, but not sure I’m ready. What’s the deal with comedy contests overall? – L.P.

More stage time!

Hey L.P. – Here’s a big chunk of personal opinion. I like comedy contests in clubs for one simple reason – stage time. Otherwise, I’m not a big fan. Winners are usually decided by audience applause and the person who packs in the most friends (voters) will win. I’ve seen this happen over and over and can’t remember ever seeing the funniest comedian (another chunk of personal opinion) actually win one of these contests. Whoever can coax in the most paying customers will be awarded, “Funniest Comedian.”

Doesn’t seem fair – does it?

Of course, the club owners and management have no problem with this because they make money from paying customers. And you know what? I also have NO PROBLEM with that because it’s show BUSINESS and if the club doesn’t make money, then comedians have one less place to perform. That’s the business part that comedians and performers in general need to understand. So, from that point of view – I’m a BIG fan of comedy contests.

But since you’re a comedian, let’s stick with the comedian’s point of view…

There are other ways to decide contest winners. Similar to the format used on the various television talent shows there might be a panel of judges making the award-winning decision. I’m sure most comedians would deem that more of a fair competition when performing in front of a loaded audience, but then you need to impress the judges. Depending on what they personally enjoy (clean comedy, adult comedy, etc.…) this might compromise your comedy voice and material.

This is also true if you have to play by their rules.

But I still got on stage!

For instance, I’ve seen comedians disqualified from contests because they’ve accidentally dropped the F-Bomb (against the rules) or went 10 seconds over their allotted time – even though the only reason they couldn’t get through their set in the given amount of time was because of audience applause and laugh breaks. But you need to follow their specific contest rules and if you don’t – then you just blew it in front of the judges.

Again – doesn’t seem fair, does it? The losers will tell you that, while the winners will add the award to their resumes.

Here’s the real scoop about comedy contests.

A BIG name, BIG time comedy contest is a BIG deal and will open up BIG opportunities for the BIG winners.

Think BIG – like the winners of the almost-forgotten television show Last Comic Standing or contests associated with a major city or festival like Montreal, Boston, New York or San Francisco. Win one of those and you not only will be seen by many important entertainment industry movers and shakers, but you could even wind up with your own sitcom.

No BS – I’ve seen it happen.

Of course there are always two sides to everything. Some of the best comedians I’ve worked with and respect the most never won a local comedy contest. And you know what? I don’t think any of them really care. They were simply dedicated to being good comedians and losing a contest never stopped them from working toward their goal. They also would never have considered changing who they are on stage or what language they use, and instead develop material that the judges would approve of next time.

That’s not why they got into the biz in the first place.

I’ll also make an assumption and say that during the early days of their careers they might have entered a local contest or two. But I’m sure they only did it for the same reason I’ll tell you to do it – stage time. I remember a few comics at the NYC Improv going to other clubs for contests and not even staying to see who won. That wasn’t important – getting on stage was.

Any time you have an opportunity to get on stage and work on your act, grab it and use it to your advantage. As you should know, improving as a comedian (humorous speaker or performer in general) can only happen through performing experience. And you know what comedy contests offer?

STAGE TIME.

Yeah, they may also offer cash prizes and more stage time, so of course you want to win to reap those benefits. But if you don’t, there’s no reason to sweat it or feel bad.

By the way, that’s why I’m not a big fan of comedy contests. Not everyone starts out in the business with a thick skin. That has to be developed if you ever plan to be serious about a comedy career. Newer comedians might put too much weight behind a comedy contest and feel if they don’t win, they’re not talented. No – it just means you didn’t bring enough friends, didn’t cater to the judge’s sense of humor, or haven’t had enough stage experience. There are no short cuts – sorry.

But you still win because you get stage time. So, contests are good for that reason.

If you win the contest – that’s great! I hope it leads to more stage time. But if you don’t…

Like I’ve mentioned, a lot of top comedians never won a contest and never lost any sleep over it. They took advantage of the experience on stage and used it to become better comedians.

So go ahead – enter. Just know why you’re doing it.

For the experience. Not the trophy.

Thanks for reading and as always – keep laughing!

Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.

For comments, questions about workshops and coaching please email – Dave@TheComedyBook.com

3 Lessons I Learned From a 30-Year Comedy Veteran – Dave Schwensen

Posted on by

By Siddesh Pai – “I Help Comedians, Humor Keynote Speakers & Entrepreneurs Enhance Their Personal Brand Through Targeted Newsletters | Standup Comedian”

Readers: You can locate Siddesh Pai through the following link on LinkedIn. This is an interview we did earlier this year and I liked it enough to share it. Thanks Siddesh and keep laughing!!

https://www.linkedin.com/in/siddeshpai/

3 Lessons I Learned From a 30-Year Comedy Veteran – Dave Schwensen

Talking comedy

Dave has been working in comedy for three decades. But he wants to make one thing clear: he’s not a stand-up comedian. To me, it felt like a writer who doesn’t read. But that’s exactly what makes him different—he’s spent his career booking, coaching, and writing on the business of comedy. In our conversation, he dropped some serious wisdom on why treating comedy like a business is the key to making it a career.

1) Comedy Can’t Be Taught—But It Can Be Coached

“I don’t believe you can teach comedy. What I think is funny, you might not. My kids certainly don’t think I’m funny.” I can’t tell you the Three Stooges are funny if you don’t find slipping on a banana peel hilarious, there’s nothing he can do to change that. This is where coaching comes in. Every comedian has a different style, a different rhythm, and a different worldview. Dave helps comics refine that—polishing the delivery, cutting the fat from jokes, and shaping a strong act. Because at the end of the day, you can’t teach funny. But you can help someone be funnier.

2) No One Is Going to Hand You Stage Time – You Have to Create It

“You can’t teach timing, you can’t teach delivery, and you sure as hell can’t teach stage presence. You have to get up there and do it.” Most comedians think getting better means hitting open mics over and over. But Dave has a different take – go where the audience actually wants entertainment. Clubs are competitive. You’re performing for other comics, waiting for their turn. But business events, fundraisers, and community groups? They’re desperate for entertainment. Your first gigs might be free, but that’s how you build momentum. One day, you’re performing at a Rotary Club for free. The next, someone offers you $500 to do the same set. Stage time is currency. The more you get, the faster you grow.

3) They Call It Amateur Night, But No One Is Trying to Hire an Amateur

A lot of comedians treat stand-up like a passion project. But the ones who make a career out of it? They treat it like a business. – Networking Matters – Hanging out with comics at open mics isn’t enough. Get to know bookers, producers, and event organizers. These are the people who can actually get you paid work. – Market Yourself – Being funny isn’t enough if no one knows you exist. Build a brand, create content, and stay on people’s radar. Your name should pop up when someone’s looking for a comedian. – Be a Professional – Show up on time. Have a tight five. Be easy to work with. Give people your business card. Make yourself easy to book. The comedians who get booked aren’t just the funniest—they’re the ones who treat it like a business.

Thanks for reading – and keep laughing!

Click on the banner below to sign up for Dave’s free newsletter.

For comments, questions about workshops and coaching please email – Dave@TheComedyBook.com